


ocean man

by CaptainButts



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Baekyeol are bad omg, M/M, Office Worker Suho, Police Officer Kris, Smut, Tao and Jongin are kids surprise, brief office smut, i hate this im sorry hana happy birthday i love you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-23
Updated: 2017-03-23
Packaged: 2018-10-09 14:15:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10414017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainButts/pseuds/CaptainButts
Summary: “What’s my number one goal in life hyung?”“To make me miserable,” Junmyeon says back.Baekhyun rolls his eyes. “Besides that.”(or: junmyeon is an office worker and everything goes wrong in his life, until he gets pulled over by a cocky police officer.)





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bdock](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bdock/gifts).



> this is so bad and rushed im so sorry hana i love you i hope you like this anyway. LOL  
> mostly unbetad, but thanks ben!!!!

Of course this would happen to Junmyeon. He hisses as he glances at his rearview mirror to see flashing red and blue lights. The sirens blare and he quickly flings his phone to the passenger seat, Jongdae still nagging him on the call. He curses under his breath, Junmyeon meant to hang up.

“I’m being pulled over,” he sighs, clearly resigned. “Shut up, please.”

“ _No, we’re doing this now. I don’t care if you’re on your deathbed, Junmyeon, you--_ ”

Junmyeon tunes him out, counting to ten as he lets out deep breaths. He rubs desperately at his eyes, trying to will away his tears. It doesn’t work. Anyone within a mile radius of Junmyeon would know that he had indeed been grossly sobbing for the past half hour.

The cop car slows to a stop right behind him, the police officer climbing out of his vehicle cooly. Junmyeon stares at his steering wheel, gripping it tight until his knuckles are completely white. There’s a knock on his window, and normally he would be nervous, jittery even. He rolls down his window and smiles tightly, the policeman is rather tall, has a large frame and pair of glasses perched on the bridge of his nose. The officer has to lean down to speak to Junmyeon through the window, his elbows coming down to rest on his car door.

“How can I help you today officer?” His voice is lackluster and tight, but as this day grew progressively worse and worse, Junmyeon couldn’t find the energy to be--well, anything, especially not when Jongdae is still on the line with him.

“ _Junmyeon? Junmyeon, are you listening to me?_ ” Comes Jongdae’s voice from his phone on the seat next to him. “ _Junmyeon you fucking--_ ” He tunes him out again, but from the look on the officer’s face, he’s sure Jongdae used a very wide array of colorful language.

As Junmyeon looks at the cop, his eyes try to focus on anything other than the fact that the cop looks insanely amused. His plump lips quirk up into a tiny smirk, before his deep voice drawls out in a whisper, “Go on. Answer him.” Junmyeon swallows thickly, mostly because of the fact that this cop is pretty. Yes, he meant pretty, and for a second he had to rerun what the policeman had just said to him--he was way too focused on the man’s lips to remember. God, he’s glad he isn’t crying anymore. He quickly grabs his cellphone and hits the end button.

“Sorry, I’m not having the best day,” Junmyeon admits with a short, self-deprecating  laugh.

“I can tell from the sound of it.” The police office nods his head understandingly. “What happened?”

Junmyeon lets out a shaky sigh. “I would literally talk your ear off, it’s a long story.”

The officer shrugs. “Don’t need to be anywhere particularly soon. Run it by me real quick, sweetheart.”

 _Sweetheart?_ Junmyeon flushes at the sound of the nickname, but goddammit he is a law abiding citizen, and he refuses to get on this cop’s bad side by not answering him. “My kids prepared me something nice for father’s day, but I…” His voice breaks a bit. “I forgot that today was my day to pick them up from school. It’s just been--” Junmyeon’s words are heavy in his throat. He feels like a mess, and the officer probably thinks he is one too. “--do you ever just feel like a failure?” Junmyeon lets his head fall to his steering wheel, honking his horn loudly on accident before he snaps back up. “My ex had to pick them up and now I’m being nagged at.”

Whistling, the officer nods. “Sounds like one stressful day… Probably not the best time to be pulled over by a cop either, huh?” The officer gives him an awkward smile. “And your ex wife doesn’t seem too happy, that’s gonna be one awkward conversation.” His mouth goes a little dry.

“Ex husband, actually,” He corrects. Junmyeon shifts his gaze again, trying not to stare at the way the uniform constricts against the cop’s chest. His biceps are big and visible through his shirt and did it get a bit hotter in Junmyeon’s car? Junmyeon internally screams, laughing awkwardly at nothing. “But yeah, it’s been a hell of a day.”

The officer sends him a pitying look, his thick, dark eyebrows furrowing together. “You look like you could use a break. Make it up to your kids, take them out this weekend--somewhere you don’t usually take them.” He rubs the back of his neck, trying to think of something to follow up. “You care about them a lot, right? Just be honest with them.”

Junmyeon nods, “Yeah, I try to be. They’re a pair of preteens so… I don’t really know how much they value honesty.”

“I get you,” The cop makes a face. “But at least you’re trying. In the future they’ll definitely remember that.”

“What? That I tried? My sons don’t even remember what they ate for dinner yesterday, I highly doubt that,” Junmyeon counters, thinking back to how Tao was barely awake over his dinner bowl, head nodding off as he fought sleep. The kid had spent the entire night before watching dramas with his brother, who didn’t even bother using his chopsticks, settling for burying his face into his food. Junmyeon was too busy laughing at his sons to scold them for improper table manners.  

“Trying makes a difference,” The officer says solemnly now. “Believe me, it does.”

His heart swells at the cop’s concern. “Thank you, officer,” He smiles genuinely.

“Call me Kris. Also, I need to see your license and registration.” He waves his wrist dismissively, “Y’know, protocol.”

And if his asshole wasn’t quivering before, it sure as fuck is now. His voice is so deep, so sultry. Junmyeon bites his lip at the way Kris looks at him. Kris tilts his head and lets out a light chuckle. He pushes his glasses up with a finger and runs his tongue over his lips and that alone has Junmyeon sweating.

“Oh, yeah, of course.” Junmyeon unbuckles his seatbelt and reaches over to his glove compartment to pull out his car registration and hands it to Kris. He reaches into his back pocket to pull out his wallet, then gives him his ID. Kris looks at it for a second and nods. “Be right back,” he says, walking to the back of his vehicle to check Junmyeon’s plates.

Junmyeon sighs into his hands, hoping to god he’s not reading into something that isn’t there. _Please don’t be straight, please don’t be straight,_ he practically chants as he watches Kris’ figure approach. He straightens his back, preening as Kris leans back inside. Junmyeon blatantly checks him out now, mouth fucking watering because his night just did a whole one-eighty and Junmyeon is two seconds away from hopping out of his vehicle and doing the splits on Kris’ dick. But of course he wouldn’t, because life for Junmyeon is tragic and there’s no way a cop pulling him over would ever be a good thing. Ever.

“You know, before I let you go,” Kris says to him, that insufferable smirk still plastered on his face as he leans in to whisper, “I just wanna let you know that you’re the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.” He says it like a secret.

What?

_What?_

Junmyeon nearly chokes on his own breath before he stutters out, “Excuse me? Repeat that for me?”

Kris looks at him uncertainly now. “I said I think you’re really cute.” He coughs awkwardly. “Was I reading this wrong? Have we not been flirting? God, I did it again--”

Junmyeon lets out a soft giggle, his heart is pounding in his chest when he gestures for Kris to come in just a bit closer. He watches the cop raise a brow before leaning further through the window. He cups Kris’ ear with his hand and says softly, “The feeling is mutual.”

Kris eyes him before clearing his throat. “Sir, please step out of your vehicle.”

…

It’s really cold out, despite it being mid-summer. But it is nighttime, so he instinctively wraps his cardigan over his small frame. He’s all too relieved when Kris presses his back against the cool, steel exterior of his car, caging him in with his hands as he pushes their bodies together. Junmyeon’s breath is labored with Kris’ mouth attached to his neck, sliding his hand up Junmyeon’s shirt before biting down on sensitive skin lightly. Junmyeon lets out an embarrassingly low moan, his eyes fluttering closed, tilting his head to let it rest on the roof of his car. They’re in public. It’s night time and no one is out, but they’re in public and Junmyeon is fucking over the moon. He’s never done anything like this.

Kris palms him through his jeans before nudging Junmyeon’s thighs apart with his knee.

Their mouths meet sloppily and Junmyeon whimpers against Kris’ lips. He feels Kris tugging at the button on his slacks, somehow managing to unzip them to push Junmyeon’s briefs down and get Junmyeon’s cock out. The cold hits his hardening cock and he swears if it had been anyone else, Junmyeon would have probably lost his erection, but Kris is pushing all the right buttons and Junmyeon doesn’t want to stop--especially not when Kris’ digs his thumb right into his slit. Junmyeon grits his teeth, trying desperately not to cum too quick. God, he feels like he’s fucking _fourteen_ again, but he bears it and pulls Kris closer to him.

Junmyeon cums embarrassingly quick with Kris’ name on his lips. The other smirks against his temple. He moves to try and reciprocate, but Kris only opens Junmyeon’s door for him. “Get home safely,” Kris says softly. “Hope that helped relieve some stress.”

Junmyeon opens his mouth to protest, his hands still gripping onto Kris’ wrists when Kris turns away, walking back to the police car. Junmyeon lets out a sigh as he slinks back into the driver’s seat. He makes a face, when Kris suddenly comes back. “Almost forgot,” he smiles cheekily at Junmyeon, handing him a slip of paper that Junmyeon realizes…

“Is this a fucking ticket?” He hisses out, glaring at Kris. “Are you serious?”

Kris tosses his head back in laughter in response, “Sorry, I don’t make the rules, sweatie ;)” is etched in poor handwriting on the back of the ticket. Kris pats Junmyeon’s door before leaving. Junmyeon rolls his window up quickly, hands reaching out to grip his steering wheel before he lets out a low groan. “I can’t believe this is my life.”

…

The next few days pass by quickly, he takes the asshole cop’s advice and takes his kids on a weekend trip to Busan to make up for it.

“Dad,” Jongin nudges him, clearly concerned about his father’s inattentiveness. “What’s wrong?”

Junmyeon shakes his head to get out of his thoughts. He really hadn’t meant to space out for a second. “Nothing, why?”

Jongin shrugs in response. “That was the fourth ice cream bar Tao just ate, just thought you’d be concerned about your son’s unhealthy eating habits, no big deal.” Junmyeon looks at Tao who’s indeed blissed out, biting into yet another cone before Junmyeon snatches it from his hands.

“You’re older,” Junmyeon warns him. “Be a good influence.”

Tao pouts. “I don’t want to be older! I just want to play!” He jumps out of his beach chair and runs out to the water before Junmyeon can tell him that he’s definitely going to get a stomachache.

“He’s going to throw up, isn’t he?” Jongin sighs exasperatedly as Junmyeon nods his head slowly.

“Absolutely.”

“Can we let him?” Jongin smirks at his dad. “It’ll be funny.”

Junmyeon flicks Jongin’s ear, earning himself a noise of protest from his son. “Go get your brother, we should be getting back to the inn soon.”

Annoyed, Jongin lets out a sigh before muttering a small ‘fine’ under his breath. “We can tell when something’s wrong you know?” Junmyeon freezes when he sees his son looking at him, clearly upset.

“I know,” he whispers.

They spend the rest of the night in a pile on the king sized bed of their hotel room. Tao chose the movie, insisting that he could definitely without a doubt handle the conjuring, until it gets ten minutes in and Jongin and Junmyeon turn to find him struggling to hold back his tears. Junmyeon tries not to laugh but holds his eldest son close to his chest, rocking him back in forth in comfort. They turn off the movie and settle for something more lighthearted until Junmyeon’s sons pass out against him.

He sighs into Jongin’s hair, running his fingers through it gently, so not to stir him from his sleep. He’s growing so much taller, his youngest son, so much taller and he’s becoming so wise. Junmyeon doesn’t want to cry, he still feels bad about missing father’s day. Hopefully they know he’s trying, and Kris’ words ring back in his head.

_At least you’re trying. In the future they’ll definitely remember that._

Junmyeon really hopes so.

...

He drops his sons back at Jongdae’s house at the end of the weekend. Parting with his sons is always the hardest, especially when Jongdae gives him those long, knowing stares. They’re friends, they really are. Jongdae and him broke it off after realizing that they didn’t exactly have that spark anymore; living together grew toxic when day after day all they did was tiptoe around each other, trying not to make the other upset. It grew taxing, before they realized that it definitely wasn’t a healthy environment for their kids to grow up in. They split when the kids were still babies, and it’s usually fine between them. Except when Jongdae is upset. Junmyeon watches the kids cautiously move around Jongdae, eyeing him with fear before they both dart up the stairs to their bedroom.

“What is it, Chen?”

“You know where I’m going with this.” Jongdae looks at him and rolls his eyes. “You’ve been working too hard, the boys are worried about you. Fuck, Suho, _I’m_ worried for you.”

Jongdae rests his hand on Junmyeon’s shoulder that Junmyeon immediately relaxes into. “Please take care of yourself.”

Junmyeon sighs as Jongdae pulls him in close. He leans into the embrace. “I will take care of myself, I promise.”

…

He doesn’t.

Junmyeon makes a schedule; _Mondays, Tuesdays, Fridays: pick Jonginie and Tao up from school @3:15._ He keeps his desk pristine, eyes lingering on his family picture of him before he turns his attention back to the pile of paperwork his supervisor placed on his desk. He’s working overtime for the third time this week. Looking around the office, he realizes quickly that everyone had gone home--the fluorescent lights flicker above his cubicle, and for a second he gets a little bit scared. Junmyeon lets out a shaky breath. “You’re doing great, Junmyeon,” he murmurs. “Just a few more papers and you’ll be done before you know it.”

Before he knows it, he’s spent two long, grueling hours hunched over his desk, filing papers into his company’s database and crunching out numbers faster than he ever had. He’s honestly not even sure he correctly filed some of the cases, but he’s literally five second away from jumping out the window of the eighth floor. He slumps over the desk, absolutely drained by the end of it. He’s almost too tired to move. Almost. A low groan rumbles out from across the room. Junmyeon whips his head up, eyes searching the office in a panic. “Hello?” He calls out tentatively. “Anyone else here?”

There’s no answer. Junmyeon reaches for his phone instinctively when he hears the guttural noise again, this time followed by sharp, quick gasps of air.

Junmyeon gulps, eyes wide with fear as he quickly reaches for his satchel and dashes to the door. The sounds are louder with each footstep he takes, and when he reaches the door, he sees it. Them, actually. He stops and gives them a deadpan look.

There are moments in his life where people turn to him with giant grins on their faces as they ask “Wow, it must be great working with your friends, right?”

To which he promptly laughs, “Yeah, it’s the best!” which roughly translates to “I would rather set myself on fire than work with any of them, but I have a five year contract with this company plus medical benefits, so I’m stuck here.”

Baekhyun speaks first. “Hi hyung, nice night we’re having here, right?” He laughs jovially, his fingers still tugging lightly on Chanyeol’s hair. Chanyeol is on his knees, mouth filled with-- Junmyeon looks away, he really didn’t want to see that. Chanyeol makes a garbled noise that Junmyeon assumes is a greeting before he sinks further and further down Baekhyun’s dick.

Junmyeon feels a little bit sick.

“God _dammit_ you two.” Junmyeon blanches, covering his mouth with his hand. Of course they were fucking on company property (He can’t count how many times he’s caught them doing this, and he doesn’t know why he’s so shocked). “Can’t you do this at your apartment? Or literally anywhere else?”

Baekhyun pouts, letting his head fall back onto the edge of his cubicle--wait, scratch that, it’s not even his cubicle, it’s Luhan’s. Poor guy is going to come to work with his keyboard covered in cum. Junmyeon shakes his head.

Baekhyun pushes Chanyeol’s head back, Chanyeol popping off his dick with a loud groan of protest. “What’s my number one goal in life hyung?”

“To make me miserable,” Junmyeon says back.

Baekhyun rolls his eyes. “Besides that.”

“I don’t know, fuck on every possible surface of this office building.”

“Exactly. And we’ve already fucked on about three-fourths of the desk in the office--”

“Please, please don’t tell me you guys fucked on my desk.”

Chanyeol howls. “Hyung, fucking on your desk gave us the idea to fuck on everyone else’s. You _inspired_ us.”

Junmyeon has no words. He promptly flips them off before he walks out the door. He ignores their calls for him to come back.

In all, he’s not sure what would have been worse: a ghost haunting the eighth floor of his office building or catching his friends fucking on a desk. He would choose an encounter with a ghost any day.

So, the question arises, does Junmyeon regret working at the same company as his friends? Yes, yes he does.

…

On the way home, Junmyeon tries to drown out the thoughts of his friends fucking on his desk. He shakes his head, reaching forward to turn on the radio when he looks in the rearview mirror to see a cop car trailing after him. He furrows his brows, squinting his eyes to try and see the face of the officer behind the wheel.

The police car is pretty good distance behind him, so he can’t really make out the officer’s features.

A few minutes pass by and he nears his neighborhood, his eyes darting back to look into his mirror and see that the cop is _still_ following him. Why?

What did he do to deserve this?

Junmyeon groans when he turns a corner and the cop car immediately follows after him. He doesn’t want to speed and try to get away. He doesn’t want to give the cop the opportunity to pull him over. But he also doesn’t want the officer to follow him home.

Junmyeon decides to drop by the store, making a quick left just before his neighborhood before the car can follow after him. He quickly parks his car and waits a minute to see the cop car come into the parking lot of the supermarket. Junmyeon is sure the cop is following him now. He lets out a long sigh, then shakes his head and backs out of his parking spot, high tailing it back to his house.

Junmyeon doesn’t think much of it. Maybe he was slightly speeding but not enough to designate him to be pulled over. He tries to think positively about it; maybe it was a one time thing.

Except it isn’t.

Every night after work the same cop car would trail after him. Junmyeon would be lying if he said it didn’t freak him out.

It’s especially unnerving when Tao and Jongin are with him, arguing back and forth while Junmyeon tries not to lose his cool, especially not when there’s a cop twenty feet behind him.

“Papa, what’s wrong?” Jongin asks, head peeking out the window to try and see what his dad is staring at. “Why are you freaking out about the cop?”

“Probably because of the drugs he’s hiding in the glove compartment--” Tao says before he feigns a gasp, “ _What_? Who said that?”

Junmyeon lets out a sigh of exasperation. “This cop has been following me home every night this week.”

Jongin scrunches his brows together, giving his dad a confused look. “What? Why? You didn’t do anything wrong, did you?”

“No, no,” Junmyeon says distractedly. “I honestly don’t know what’s going on.”

Tao makes an assessing noise before he perks up. “Maybe we should pull over and ask them what the problem is.”

Junmyeon shook his head. “That sounds like something we should absolutely not do.”

Jongin shrugs noncommittally. “I mean, we have nothing to do. Just ask him why he’s been doing it so often.”

“Yeah, for real. I mean, if he’s gonna ride our ass, he should at least pull our hair.”

Junmyeon gasps, shocked at his son’s words when his foot hits the brake pedal so hard his vision goes red for a split second. The squeak of tires rings through their ears as they all let out panicked screams. The cop car rearends them, their airbags fly open. Junmyeon instinctively reaches out to keep Jongin from hitting it too hard. He turns his head to check up on Tao in the back seat. “You alright there, buddy?” Junmyeon asks, eyes frantic as he sees his son’s panic filled eyes.

“Yeah.” Tao lets out a shaky breath before he nods. “Yeah I’m okay.”

“Good, because you’re grounded for saying that.”

His son lets out an indignant squawk of protest. (“Oh, c’mon, it was funny!” He yells. Jongin shakes his head, “You literally saw it on a bumper sticker. There’s something called _originality,_ hyung, you should read about it.”)

Junmyeon is absolutely rattled by their situation. “Stay here,” he says, turning to his sons, then he opens his door to step outside and assess the damage.

He prays it’s not too big of an accident.

When he steps outside his vehicle, he realizes the cop is already standing in front of the damaged area, cursing low under his breath.

Junmyeon knows the figure quite well. He tilts his head, crossing his arms over his chest when he greets the man.

“Hi Kris,” he deadpans, eyes narrowing in on the office. Kris freezes in his spot, slowly turning to see Junmyeon standing in front of him angrily. “Wanna explain why you’ve been following me home every night?”

Kris’ eyes are wide, heat rising to his cheeks. “Uhh…”

Junmyeon shakes his head. “What is your deal, huh? You literally crashed your car into mine. My sons are with me, okay? Do you understand that? You could have killed us!”

He points at the junction between the two cars and looks down. The damage to his car isn’t too bad, a fixable dent that probably won’t cost a limb. He looks at Kris’ cop car and whistles. “Wow. That looks awful.”

Kris nods his head dumbly. “I might get fired for this.”

“Not if you don’t tell anyone.”

“Tao,” Junmyeon turns his head to his son in a warning. “ _No._ ”

Tao throws his hands up into the air. “Oh come on, papa, it’s not like anyone will _know.”_ He cups a hand to his mouth turning to Kris with a wicked grin. Kris returns the look right back at him, and Junmyeon wonders where his son got the devious streak from (probably Jongdae, he nods). “We know a guy who can fix that up real good, won’t tell a soul, _completely_ under the table.”

“Oh?” Kris quirks up a brow at Tao. “But is it legal?”

Tao shakes his head. “No.”

Junmyeon flicks his son’s ear. “It’s not illegal. Don’t tell lies, Tao.”

Tao lets out a groan. “You never let me have any fun, oh my _god_ \--”

“I’d like to know about the legitimacy of this person,” Kris lets out a snort. “But give me their number and I’ll call him up, if you’re being serious.”

Junmyeon nods. “Yeah, we know a guy. He fishes out his phone and checks his contacts and reads off the number to Kris.

Kris’ eyes narrow at the number. “Yixing? You know Yixing?”

Junmyeon’s eyes widen with disbelief. “Yeah, we’re friends from college.”

“No way,” Kris laughs. “He’s a good friend of mine from back home.”

Junmyeon and Kris lock eyes from where they’re standing, Tao shifting on his feet awkwardly before he coughs indiscreetly, “Kinda wanna go home and eat, papa.”

Junmyeon’s cheeks heat up in embarrassment and he nods quickly. “Uh, yeah, yeah. Food, eating. That’s essential.” His eyes flicker back to Kris before he waves his hand in goodbye. Tao seals his lips together tightly, shaking his head before he stage whispers to his dad, “That was so bad. Who taught you how to flirt?”

Junmyeon glares daggers at his son, instantly shutting him up. Tao dashes to the car and hops in, most likely taking notes on what not to do as an adult.

Kris laughs lightly. “You have a cute kid. You mentioned another one?” He looks up and catches two pairs of eyes on him. They disappear the second Kris looks his way.

Junmyeon nods. “Yeah, Jongin’s just a little shy right now.”

“I’d like to meet him sometime.” Junmyeon whips his head to look at Kris, who backtracks immediately. “Uhh, sorry, wait. Was that too forward?”

Junmyeon lets out a long sigh. “You mean to tell me you’ve been following me around all week, raising my blood pressure, triggering my anxiety--- all to ask me out?”

Kris sucks in a breath, biting his lip. “Well, when you put it that way…”

Junmyeon shakes his head. “If I say yes, will you stop trailing after me and _actually_ call me?”

“Can’t call you when I don’t have your number, sweetheart.”

There it is again, that fucking nickname that throws Junmyeon’s mind into a frenzy.

“Use your words, babe.” He thinks that maybe Junmyeon is just as affected as him, because the second he says it, Kris’ throat bobs. “Your number. Can I have it?”

Junmyeon walks over to him and presses him up against the hood of his (mostly dented) police car. He reaches into Kris’ back pocket and takes a pen out of his own blazer. He writes it on a ticket, pushes it into the palm of his large hand, then turns hot on his heels.

And if Junmyeon magically has his ticket paid off within the next week and manages to snag himself a hot date, he only smiles to himself.

**Author's Note:**

> kill my ucking ass i rsafjsfks the smut... i cringed okay bye  
> im @lovingthesize on twit


End file.
